Looking Back
With only three more School for Deacons' Weekends to go I wanted to take time to look back to where I've been. In some ways it's like riding on a train or in an aircraft in a rear-facing seat--It's difficult to see where you are going, but the view looking back is amazing.
The amount of work that is behind me is substantial: 30 courses all together, plus numerous retreats, and three weeks in Panama. It's hard to believe I've completed all of it looking back. I fully recognize, though, that I didn't do this on my own, but only with the help of the Spirit.
Persevering in your efforts; hanging onto "Just one more thing": having the encouragement of a fellow classmate: All of these things contribute to the forward movement. When it comes down to it, however, the most important piece of all is grasping onto the the belief that God is calling you to this ministry, and her Spirit will help carry you along the way when times are toughest.
At some point in this journey you realize that you also are there to reach out to the people in the process behind you and encourage them in following this path.
May God reach out to your heart and give you the courage to take up this call.
At the midpoint of this semester I preached the following at Evening Prayer on March 3rd:
Genesis 43:16-34
Mark 5:1-20
In listening to our two seemingly unrelated
readings this evening I was suddenly struck with the realization that they both
share an almost invisible theme of The Unexpected Turn in a way I hadn’t seen before.
In our view of Joseph this evening we see a
man who has reached his peak in power and influence in the Kingdom of Egypt.
Joseph is not a mere steward of Pharaoh, distributing grain and amassing wealth
for Pharaoh’s treasury. When Joseph had interpreted Pharaoh’s dream of seven
fat years with seven lean years Pharaoh had recognized the Truth of God within
Joseph and made him a Priest of Heliopolis, the center of worship for the
Sun-god Atum, later known as Ra, by decreeing the marriage of Joseph to
Asenath, daughter of the Chief Priest of Atum. Joseph, then, is a priest who
delivers bread to the people of the kingdom.
Through no fault of his own, young Joseph
became the envy of his brothers, being deemed by Jacob as his favorite. While
his older brothers were sent out to the fields to care for the flocks, Joseph
was kept at home, the joy of his father’s eye. Poor Joseph was so naïve, that
he didn’t even realize his brothers’ envy of his position. I wonder how long it
took Joseph after he was thrown into the well to realize something was amiss.
Did he sit in that well thinking it was some kind of brotherly joke? Was it
several days after being chained to a caravan before his eyes were opened?
In spite of the physical duress he was under
as a slave, as many of us know it’s the emotional pain that hurts the worst. I
can hear Joseph saying “My brothers, my closest friends, did this to me? Was my
father in on this, too?” The heartbreak must have been unimaginable. How awful
and deep it is when we are hurt by the ones we love.
Rather than fall into despair, Joseph lived
with the faith of Jacob and decided to serve well
wherever he was sent. In
other words, Joseph chose to live righteously in spite of his unjust situation.
As a result, “The Lord was with Joseph, and he became a successful man” [Gen
39:2]
This way of righteous living didn’t always
endear Joseph to people. For refusing Potiphar’s wife’s advances Joseph was
falsely accused of assault and thrown into prison.
Even in Pharaoh’s dungeon Joseph continued
on his righteous way of living, caring for the other prisoners. How often did
Joseph question God’s faithfulness through all of his travails? After all,
Joseph lived in slavery or prison for almost 20 years before Pharaoh finally
took notice of him. Twenty years of darkness and misery, but clinging to one’s
faith in God. Imagine how challenging that would be!!
Finally, after being released and marrying
Asenath, who bore him Manasseh and Ephraim, Joseph is reported to have said
“God has made me forget all my hardship and all my father’s house.” [Gen 41:51]
In today’s reading it’s almost 10 years
later that Joseph’s brothers show up asking for food for their people. The real
humanity of Joseph shows
through, however! Joseph is not some kind of hagiographic saint who has fully
forgiven and forgotten—after all, he throws his brothers into prison for 3 days
on false charges of being spies. He keeps Simeon incarcerated while demanding
the other brothers bring back Benjamin. He arranges to falsely accuse Benjamin
of theft, and making him a slave, before he finally reveals his true loving
self to his kinfolk. I can easily imagine the inner struggles Joseph suffered
through—the temptation he wrestled with to use his absolute power to wreak
fully-justified revenge.
It is this very real, human inner conflict
in Joseph involving the choice between the intertwined emotions of heartbreak, revenge and power, on one
hand, versus living righteously and
lovingly before God, on the other. Each one of us suffer through this same
kind of inner conflict today, don’t we? What an Unexpected Turn of
understanding!
In
our scene this evening from Mark we meet one of the most famous unnamed
persons of the Gospel—the demoniac afflicted by Legion. This poor man had
become so out of control that not even chains could hold him, so he lived among
the dead of that area—a lost soul dead
to the world, but not even buried in peace.
How long had he lived with this affliction?
The Gospels don’t tell us. What did he eat? Insects? Plants? Dead animals? Food
scraps left on occasion? He had been constantly tormented by these demons
inside, beating himself with stones—caused by the demons? Or an attempt by
himself to end his torment? Perhaps both!
He immediately rushes to Jesus and addresses
him as “Son of the Most High God”, an appellation of Greek origin, not
surprising since this area is called the Decapolis—the ten Greek cities. While
in other stories Jesus seems hesitant to heal non-Jews, Jesus immediately works
to cure this poor creature, out of empathy for the plight of this most cast-out
person. Can you be any more of an outcast from society when you are living
among the dead?
From this community’s perspective this man
is dead to the world, but Jesus restores him to life by driving out the demons,
and in their place leaving God’s peace. Imagine how relieved this man is—how
quiet his inner self has become—how free he feels after all this time of
confinement in an inner prison!
Is it any wonder, then, that this man now
wants to follow Jesus and become one of his disciples! The surprising thing is
Jesus sends him away!! What an Unexpected Turn!
How could someone who has only listened to
Jesus a short time become a bearer of the Good News? By rushing down to the
seashore to plead with Jesus to heal him, this poor, afflicted human
demonstrated his own helplessness against evil. Even in the midst of his
suffering he yearned to live a righteous life in God. While Jesus tells others
“Let the dead bury the dead”, Jesus tells this former graveyard inhabitant to
go out and “…Tell them how much the Lord has done for you…” This first preacher
to the Gentiles proceeds to tell everyone what Jesus has done for him!
With little understanding of Jewish
scripture or law, or expectation of a coming Messiah, this former demoniac
equates Jesus with the “Most High God”. The only other person in Mark’s Gospel
who makes this instantaneous declaration is another Gentile, the Roman
Centurion who witnessed Jesus’ death on the cross.
The story of these two people, Joseph and
the former demoniac, speak to us today of persevering in our faith while we
overcome the many demons and hardships of our lives.
·
It is through simple and persistent faith that
we find our way to the promise of God’s kingdom.
·
It is in recognition of our own human frailties
that we find strength through the Spirit who lifts us up.
·
It is through our willingness to serve others,
and bring them the Gospel of Hope, that we are healed of our own afflictions,
too.
As we reach this halfway point of this
semester let us reach out for God’s peace, which surely resides here among us, to
renew our strength to continue on our journeys to a new beginning. Amen.